| << | Contents | >> |
Exchanged Glory: A Vision of Freedom
<page 37>… in my heart I was trying to make the God of the Bible more like the false god of permissive-love. I was fighting to keep back a growing realization that the True God was not who I wanted Him to be. I didn’t like Him.
It took me a while to understand what had happened during that last semester of college. I wasn’t sure why my life had suddenly gotten so much better.
When it came time for me to write my marriage vows several months later, I didn’t know how I could make a commitment about what I would or wouldn’t do. I had tried to do everything right for eight years and had gotten the wrong results. Then I gave in for five months and got the right results. How could I know what I should do in my marriage?
Looking back with the insight of the past twenty-five years, I think I understand a good deal of what occurred. I believe there were two significant reasons I changed.
First, God had put me in a situation where people were able to minister to my emotional problems. At the time, I was caught in a lack of wisdom called codependency. I didn’t know how to put pain behind me, so past hurts tended to mix with new hurts until my inner turmoil snowballed into obsessive behavior. I had pain from a lack of communication with my parents, which was then compounded when I became isolated as the only Christian in my family, and then grew worse as I struggled to follow Jesus. The ache in my heart was pushing me toward addiction and depression.
My pain was greatly cut down by the friends I had during my last semester. I experienced more love and support than I had known since early childhood.
Along with my friends, I found what I wanted more than almost anything else, a relationship with a man, Denny Strickland, who became a father to me. Denny invited me to his house regularly, and we talked for hours into the night. Sometimes, we wouldn’t finish until well past midnight. For the first time in my life, I poured out my hopes, fears, and frustrations to another human being. Somehow, Denny got me to talk in a way that no other person had been able to, and it was like a healing balm to my soul. The destructive emotions that had gripped me for years began to weaken. As they changed, my heart began to heal so that I was able to think more clearly and hear what God was saying to me.
The second reason my life changed is even more significant, because it gets to the root of sexual addiction. It was that my knowledge of God had changed. I will spend the rest of this chapter and all of the next looking at this in detail.
<page 38>For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened.
These verses tell us that we all know about God. We are created with a built-in ability that clearly perceives His eternal power and Godhead in creation. This knowledge, however, is suppressed in us because of unrighteousness. It is still there, but our thoughts and actions make it difficult to recognize. Our unrighteousness together with the unrighteousness of those around us clouds our vision.
When we suppress the truth in this way, it is similar to what happens when we try to suppress a volleyball in a swimming pool. We can keep it under water for a time, but if we aren’t careful, it tends to pop up. In the same way, suppressed truth tends to pop up in our lives even if we are resisting it. Here are a few of many examples:
People who haven’t prayed for years sometimes pray when they are in a difficult situation, for example, if their life is threatened. They have suppressed the truth about prayer, but it pops up when they are in danger.
Some who say that human beings evolved by chance will claim that all life has great meaning. If life is an accident, then who can say what it means, if it means anything at all? It wouldn’t be totally illogical to conclude that we should kill off the weak so that survival of the fittest can genetically improve the human race. If the death of the weak is how we evolved into who we are, why should we stop with our current step in the process? I believe that most who believe in chance evolution will not allow for these kinds of conclusions because the truth of God pops up. It is hard to hold it down to the point where we would allow murder.
I had suppressed the truth about sin and the judgment of God. All around me, the reality of human rebellion and the resulting suffering was being acted out, but I couldn’t seem to make sense of it. I had replaced the truth of God with futile imaginations about what a loving God would be like, and my foolish heart was darkened. It was only when the word of God exposed my deception that I was able to face the reality from which I had been hiding.
Since this is a book about sexual issues, I will share a few points about how our sexuality, when expressed well, reveals God’s truth. In a healthy marriage, the husband is a picture of Jesus Christ, and the wife is a picture of His church. The marriage is a living demonstration of God’s heart for relationship with people.
<page 39>…For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
A healthy marriage is a union bound by joy, cooperation, and sacrifice for each other. It is an ongoing relationship that is a symbol of the joy, cooperation, and sacrifice we can have with God through Jesus Christ. A healthy marriage spreads the knowledge of God’s goodness in the earth.
By contrast, sex outside of marriage is a distortion. It violates of what sex was designed to be. It ignores the reality that this sort of relationship affects us physically and emotionally in ways that are intended to bind us together with a spouse “till death do us part.” Without that commitment, it is like using superglue to bind objects together only to splinter them when pulled apart. Or it binds us to unhealthy fantasies, for example with pornography. Paul calls it a sin against our body (1 Corinthians 6:18). It tends to lead to heartache, disease, broken families, fatherlessness, and other ills. When we walk this path, the truth of God’s goodness is suppressed in our unrighteousness (Romans 1:18).
The relationship between parents and children is also a picture of God’s love for us.
Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!
As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you; and you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.
The goodness of God is revealed when fathers and mothers love, train, and comfort their children. The parents are a picture of His desire to help people grow well. But when parents fail to imitate God’s love, for example when there is separation because a child is born out of wedlock or because of divorce, the truth is suppressed in unrighteousness (Romans 1:18).
How many people have been influenced to reject God when their parents presented a distorted image of what He is like? How many have failed to grasp His nurturing and discipling heart, in part, because they haven’t seen families demonstrate these qualities? God’s judgment against us is based in truth when we choose not to practice His plan for families (Romans 2:2).
Romans 1:18 (quoted above) mentions two types of sins that get us into trouble:
<page 40>The first, unrighteousness, is the one we usually think of as sin. It consists of wrong actions and attitudes. An example of unrighteousness is engaging in sex outside of marriage.
The second type of sin is ungodliness. The Greek word for ungodliness comes from two smaller words. The first means “bad” and the second means “devout” or “worship.” Ungodliness is basically “bad worship.” When we serve the wrong god or worship the true God in the wrong way, we are being ungodly.[15] The next two verses in Romans 1 describe ungodliness.
Professing to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and crawling creatures.
(Romans 1:22-23, NAS)
These verses say that people have replaced the true God with images. Before the influences of Christianity and modern philosophies, we tended to worship idols, which are images that can be seen and touched. In the past few centuries, we have moved away from bowing before wood and stone. We tend to fashion mental images instead.
Whether they are physical or mental, worshipping any sort of false god is ungodliness.
Let me describe my false god. He was first and foremost nonjudgmental. He understood how hard it was to be human, and he had no desire or need to punish us for our weaknesses and little sins. After all, if he didn’t “grade on a curve,” who could get into heaven? He sent only a few very evil people to hell, like Hitler for example.
A part of me found a God who threw people into eternal torment for sinning to be repugnant. A ruler on earth who judged by that kind of standard would be considered a vile enemy of mankind. What excuse did a ruler in heaven have for acting in a way that violated the basic tolerance and kindness we expect from ourselves and others?
If I were to name my image, I would call him the false god of permissive-love.[16] He could be worshipped with hundreds of different theologies: Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, agnostic, etc., but under the surface he was the same caring guy. He loved people and wanted them to get along. How could he worry about little details like theology and worship style when more important issues like human happiness were at stake?
I believe that the false god of permissive-love is now the main false god in the United States. He (or she) is a very attractive image for those who live in a global village where we are in contact with hundreds of different philosophies and religions. It is hard for us to accept that all of them could be wrong except for Christianity, so we tend to believe in a god who expresses himself (or herself) in many faiths.
<page 41>When I gave my life to Jesus at the age of fourteen, it was in part because I was too young to know what to do with the fact that the God of the Bible wasn’t the false god of permissive-love. I read about His law, eternal punishment, and Christ’s sacrifice, and just wasn’t well trained and critical enough to say, “Wait a minute; do I really want to believe in this?” I entered a mixed state of belief and deceit where I accepted the words of the Bible with my mind, but couldn’t buy into them with my heart.
I subconsciously looked for ways to improve the God of the Bible. I soft pedaled hell and emphasized His love at every opportunity. I pointed out that He separated our sins from us as far as the east is from the west. He was a God of grace rather than law.
I talked about Jesus bringing God’s mercy instead of all of the harsh judgments of the Old Testament. It was as if God had changed personalities when Jesus came. Previously, He had ordered the slaughter of the people of Canaan and was always irritated with Israel. After Christ, He realized that all of the judgment hadn’t accomplished much and decided to be nicer. I wanted to believe that God had changed, or that He had never really been wrathful to start with. My heart couldn’t grasp that mercy had triumphed over judgment through the death and resurrection of Jesus.
An emphasis on love is good, but in my heart I was trying to make the God of the Bible more like the false god of permissive-love. I was fighting to keep back a growing realization that the True God was not who I wanted Him to be. I didn’t like Him.
The volleyball of suppressed truth was pushing its way to the surface. While I thought I was doing God a favor, I was actually trying to hold down His revelation. I was hanging on to ungodliness by mixing a false image with God’s word about Himself.
After eight years, I stopped defending God. The stark statements of the Bible together with my frustration in trying to obey Him had overcome my attempts to “improve” Him. He was who He was, and I was going to have to face up to the truth of His word. While I was reading Romans 1 and 2, I finally did. He and I had a showdown, and fortunately He won.
I need to point out one more false god before moving on, because even though it was not the primary image for me, it is one that many people confuse with the God of the Bible. I call it the false god of harshness.
In the eyes of this mental idol, most of us are unacceptable. We don’t have the will power to be nice enough, sexually pure enough, or religious enough. We are spiritual failures.
It is hard to have fun in this god’s world. In fact, the reason most people are unacceptable to him is that they aren’t religious enough to give up the joy of living. They do it for a while, but then they break down and go on a blissful binge which leaves them feeling guilty.
If the false god of harshness listens to us at all, he listens out of obligation. If he loves us at all, it is because a god has the job of loving people. The thought that he might actually enjoy us or smile when he sees us is almost unimaginable.
<page 42>When we sin, he makes us do serious penance. We have to pay for our transgressions, and it seems that there is never enough we can do to win his approval back. We can only hope that if we grovel for long enough he will put up with us.
Often this image is a reflection of one or both of our parents. People with harsh parents can have an especially hard time with their Father in heaven. They may embrace Jesus as Lord, but they can’t seem to figure out what a relationship with their Heavenly Father is supposed to be like. Tragically, the term “father” makes them feel rejection rather than warmth and safety.
When we become Christians, this stern imposter likes to jump in and impose himself on the words of the Bible. As we read about the judgment of God, we can’t face it because the false god of harshness grabs our heart and drags us into condemnation. He keeps us from remembering Christ’s mercy when we read the Old Testament, making it unbearable. With every law, there is the accusation, “You aren’t good enough.” Every story of wrath seems to cry out, “That’s what I’m ready to do to you (or am doing to you).” We interpret every misfortune in life as a sign that he has run out of patience with us.
Some of us switch back and forth between the false gods of harshness and permissive-love. First, we try to satisfy the false god of harshness. We deny ourselves to win his approval, until we can’t take it anymore. Then we reject him and embrace the false god of permissive-love, who understands what it is like to be human and lets us sin and have some fun. We celebrate our freedom for a time, until we start to feel overly guilty or suffer bad consequences. Then with a rush of fear, we realize the error of our ways, repent, and embrace the false god of harshness again. We do this until he drains us of our inner joy, and then we run back to permissive-love. We go back and forth like this, stuck in a cycle of false god induced misery.
Sometimes, we try to deal with harshness by creating a new false god who is a mixture of harshness and permissive-love. He has enough wrath so that we feel we are being scriptural, and enough love to keep us from being dragged under by rejection. Unfortunately, our new god is just another lying image who keeps us locked in idolatry.
The answer to our confusion is the God of wrath and mercy who has revealed Himself in the Bible. His wrath drives us to our knees before Him, and His mercy welcomes us there. He sent His Son to carry our punishment so that He could call us His children and smile when He looks at us.
Search Comments
This page has been visited 0002 times.
| << | Contents | >> |
10 per page