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Exchanged Glory II: The OK Stronghold
<page 62>There is great freedom in being an imperfect being held in the loving arms of a perfect God.
Suppose a man loves himself, attains great accomplishments, and has cities named after him. If God says to him on Judgment Day, “Depart from me. I never knew you,” is he OK?
On the other hand, consider a person who is despised by others, hates himself, and is a loser in almost every area of life. If he ends up going to heaven, has his failure ruined him?
Consider the thief on the cross next to Jesus (Luke 23:40-43). He lived in sin and was condemned to hang naked until he died in shame, and yet Jesus said to him, “Today you will be with me in paradise.” Is he OK?
If we truly grasp what makes us OK, it transforms our lives. The only way to really be OK is to have our sins forgiven by the Judge of the universe. The promise of living forever in heaven puts everything else into a new perspective.
Nevertheless do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rather rejoice because your names are written in heaven.
That’s why the second OK Buster, “I am Eternally OK by the Blood of Christ,”[29] is essential for finding reality. It tells us how to deal with the most important issue that threatens our wellbeing – our separation from God.
Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus…let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith.
(Hebrews 10:19; 22)
Because of Christ’s work, we can approach God with boldness. We are not bound by rules that say we can only talk to Him when we are doing well. We may have just sinned and feel guilty enough to burn in hell forever, but if we repent and have a true heart with faith, our guilt is taken away. God receives us with joy as a loving father does a child who needs encouragement (Luke 15:11-32). In spite of what our condemning Parent and shamed Child may feel, God’s word tells us we can come before Him in full assurance of faith.
<page 63> Unfortunately, even when we have confidence in the blood of Jesus, we may lack confidence in our repentance. If we habitually fall into sin, it is natural to doubt whether we fit the description in verse 22, “a true heart in full assurance of faith.” God doesn’t accept hypocrites (people who say they trust God but aren’t living like it).
Isn't it obvious that God-talk without God-acts is outrageous nonsense? …Do I hear you professing to believe in the one and only God, but then observe you complacently sitting back as if you had done something wonderful? That's just great. Demons do that, but what good does it do them? Use your heads! Do you suppose for a minute that you can cut faith and works in two and not end up with a corpse on your hands?
(James 2:17; 19-20, The Message)
If we have repented many times in the past and haven’t stopped sinning, how do we know that we aren’t just talking God-talk? Addicts especially may conclude that they are using forgiveness as an excuse rather than as an invitation to the throne of grace. How can a person know if he or she has a true heart?
In order to answer this question, I need to first explain what it means to have a healthy conscience. Some people don’t have confidence before God because they don’t know how to work with their conscience, so they feel condemned when they shouldn’t.
I first learned about this when I faced a barrage of accusing voices as a teenager.[30] I felt condemned no matter what I did and needed to sort through the difference between true and false guilt. I began to make progress when I noticed from I Corinthians 8-10 and Romans 14 that our conscience should be guided by knowledge.
Some people say, quite rightly, that idols have no actual existence, …In strict logic, then, nothing happened to the meat when it was offered up to an idol. It's just like any other meat. I know that, and you know that. But knowing isn't everything … We need to be sensitive to the fact that we're not all at the same level of understanding in this. Some of you have spent your entire lives eating "idol meat," and are sure that there's something bad in the meat that then becomes something bad inside of you. An imagination and conscience shaped under those conditions isn't going to change overnight. (emphasis added)
(1 Corinthians 8:4; 7, The Message)
At the time these verses were written, the non-Christian citizens of Corinth sacrificed animals to false gods and then sold the leftover meat to others. The question Paul was dealing with was whether it was wrong for Christians to buy and eat the meat.
He writes that if a person knew that an idol was not a real god, they also knew that nothing happened to the meat when it was offered up to an idol. It was simply killed in front of a statue. Though God wouldn’t allow one of His children to participate in the worship service in which the animal was sacrificed, the meat itself was not something that affected their relationship with Him.
<page 64>But food does not commend us to God; for neither if we eat are we the better, nor if we do not eat are we the worse.
He concluded that as long as a person understood that eating the meat wasn’t the same as participating in idolatry, they could eat with a clear conscience.
If however the person thought of the idol as a real god, they would believe that the meat had become somehow associated with it. They would feel that eating it caused them to be a part of false worship, and since God forbids this, their conscience would feel guilty. More importantly, they would be guilty, because even though God didn’t view the meat as unacceptable, He would see that they had compromised with idolatry in their heart (I Corinthians 8:7).
These verses show that our consciences follow our understanding of truth rather than the actual truth. If our understanding is wrong, our conscience will be also.
Seeing this had a big impact on me. I had thought of my conscience as a judge that I could trust to tell me what to do. I saw in God’s word that it was instead just an inner sense that pointed out whether or not I was doing what I believed was right.
I had tried to let my conscience be my guide without directing it with good knowledge.[31] Consciences weren’t designed for this. They were given to accuse or defend us based on how well we follow what we think we know.
…in that they show the work of the Law written in their hearts, their conscience bearing witness, and their thoughts alternately accusing or else defending them…
(Romans 2:15, NAS)
Our conscience is like the prosecuting attorney or the defense attorney in a courtroom. It doesn’t make up the Law, but instead it prosecutes or defends us based on whether we believe we are following it.
I was trying to be obedient in the wrong way. I had heard about the danger of justifying my sin, so I was afraid to disagree with what seemed to be my conscience. Unfortunately, in my zeal I stopped defending myself against false accusations. In my attempts to avoid pride, I opened the door for demonic and emotional voices to bring doubt about my actions.
Consciences don’t handle doubt well. They tend to condemn us when we live without faith and conviction.
But he who doubts is condemned if he eats, because he does not eat from faith; for whatever is not from faith is sin.
<page 65> We have to make firm decisions based on good knowledge. We need convictions. They not only protect us from justifying wrong actions, but they also keep us from feeling guilty about right actions. Without them, we can become deceived and our consciences seared.
Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies in hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron …
My lack of convictions put me in a position where I was in danger of being led astray by deceiving spirits. Fortunately, I remained sensitive enough to recognize that something was amiss. I didn’t act from faith as Romans 14:23 said, but my heart also knew that it was under attack. I chose not to trust the guilt I felt.
I eventually set my heart to reclaim my conscience by God’s grace and to return it to its rightful place. In order to do this, I began to spell out the Lord’s commandments. I made firm decisions about right and wrong based on careful study. I rejected guilt about activities that He didn’t condemn, and refused to feel OK about those that He said were wrong.
When I felt compelled to go beyond what He commanded, I fought back by pointing out that the Bible told me to be guided by solid truth. Feelings and voices weren’t reliable. God didn’t require me to do anything beyond His laws, which told me when I had sinned and when I hadn’t. As I stood my ground, my conscience slowly became healthy and strong.
Learning God’s ways and defending myself against false accusations helped me to have full assurance of faith when my heart unjustly condemned me. But what was I to do about the fact that I continued to sin in some areas?
I knew I wasn’t perfect. Though I was using my mind and will to follow Jesus, they could only accomplish so much. Many parts of my emotional life continued to rebel against the truth, and I didn’t know how to bring them into line.
For example, a part of me was resentful that I had to go through such great efforts to follow Jesus. Why didn’t He just take away my sinful imaginations? Why did He allow me to be so stressed on my job? Where was that love, joy, and peace that He was supposed to give me? Why did I have to work so hard to achieve what seemed to come naturally to many others? I didn’t know, and I was angry that God didn’t seem to be giving me what He had promised.
I tried to channel my anger into constructive activities like seeking God and studying, but it wasn’t always enough. At times, the only way I seemed to be able to keep my actions in line was to disconnect from my emotions. They could be a brewing cauldron of rebellion beneath the surface, and though I trusted Jesus to change them by His Spirit, it took time. I didn’t find quick answers to these sorts of sins. They sprang out of the foolishness in my heart, and I needed to grow into the wisdom for full repentance.[32]
<page 66> My conscience would rightfully accuse me about them, and I had to handle my guilt. To do this, I confessed my sin to God and relied on His promise of forgiveness. Jesus shed His blood so that my condemnation could be borne away, and He didn’t require me to be perfect before I came to Him.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
(1 John 1:9, The Message)
A few pages ago, I asked how a habitual sinner can know that his or her heart is true. I am now ready to answer that question. We have a true heart if we try to live with a healthy and clear conscience and if we trust in God’s forgiveness through the blood of Jesus. The attempt to walk with a good conscience shows that we aren’t hypocrites, as James described (James 2:17-20). Our trust in the blood of Jesus shows that we are honest with the truth. We aren’t deceiving ourselves into believing that we are good enough by ourselves.
If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
I believe that living in this way is what John meant when He wrote about walking in the light.
But if we walk in the light, God himself being the light, we also experience a shared life with one another, as the sacrificed blood of Jesus, God's Son, purges all our sin.
(1 John 1:7, The Message)
On a practical level, I assured my heart before God by asking whether I was devoting my time and effort to humbling myself and following Jesus. Was I practically seeking to have His light show me the way and expose my sins? Along with that, was I trusting the blood of Jesus to cleanse me when I fell short? If I was, I knew that I could be bold before God. If I wasn’t, I knew it was time to repent and get back into the light.
What I have just written still leaves room for more condemnation than I find comfortable. Do any of us fully walk in the light? If not, are we headed to hell for our half-heartedness? I think the Scriptures are clear that we are not.
First, God gives us time to repent.
And I gave her time to repent of her sexual immorality, and she did not repent. (emphasis added)
<page 67> Then, even when Christians resist God to the point where they are disciplined, He still shows mercy. It is possible to be disciplined so severely that we die and to still be welcomed into heaven.
For this reason many are weak and sick among you, and many sleep. For if we would judge ourselves, we would not be judged. But when we are judged, we are chastened by the Lord, that we may not be condemned with the world. (emphasis added)
Some of the Corinthians had been disciplined by God to the point where they lost their lives, yet Paul said that they would not be condemned with the world. They would rise from the sleep of death to eternal life. Though we should try to follow Jesus with all of our hearts, in the final analysis our salvation doesn’t depend on our commitment but on His mercy.
When Christians dedicate themselves to serving Him, there is no reason for concern. Unfortunately, many who claim to be Christians have not done so, at least not in a way that we can practically see.
What is their state before God? I don’t think we can say for sure. I strongly believe that many of them are OK, but only God knows whether a person has true faith or not. He judges with full knowledge; we only know in part.
Meanwhile, God's firm foundation is as firm as ever, these sentences engraved on the stones: GOD KNOWS WHO BELONGS TO HIM. SPURN EVIL, ALL YOU WHO NAME GOD AS GOD.
(2 Timothy 2:19, The Message)
Finally, sincerity (having a true heart) is a character quality that grows within us. What should we do if we are still weak in it?
I have seen people stay away from God in the name of sincerity. They act as if it is better to be an honest sinner than to risk being a religious bigot. They say, “I might be a rebel, but at least I’m not like one of those hypocrites.”
Is it better to be a hypocrite who comes to God to be delivered from his hypocrisy or to be a sincere rebel? It does no good to be self-righteous about our honesty, thinking that our transparency will make up for a lifetime of running from the truth.
I refuse to let my hypocrisy keep me from Jesus. He is the only answer I have for it, so I take whatever sin may be expressing itself in my life to the throne of grace and say, “What do You want to do about this?”
I have a confession. While some people might be afraid that on judgment day God will make public some of their secret conversations, my most shocking words are some of my prayers. I may hold the record for swearing more while praying than anyone in the history of the world. I am not proud of that, and I don’t do it regularly, but there have been times when I was so angry that I couldn’t seem to speak a sentence without cursing.[33]
<page 68> I reasoned that it was better to swear to Jesus than to not pray. Certainly, He could handle my anger, and I saw many times that He was more than willing to give me “grace to help in time of need” (Hebrews 4:16). He did this even when that need was my displeasure with Him.
I try to neither justify nor hide my sin. I bring it to be exposed in the light. This lets me see my deficiencies in the brightness of His mercy and hope. When my heart is less than one-hundred percent sincere in its repentance, I come to the One who can “sympathize with our weakness” (Hebrews 4:15). He is the only one who can show me the way to really change. Who else knows how to turn human hearts to obedience?
If He doesn’t want me to be there, I figure He can tell me to leave. He never has, and I don’t believe He ever will.
This is where the blood of Jesus is awe-inspiring and precious. It allows us to boldly come to Him no matter what our life is like. It destroys the OK Stronghold. Our whole focus changes from trying to prove ourselves to humbly walking in His forgiveness and support. We live before His throne of grace, seeking to obey not for “OKness” but out of love.
There is great freedom in being an imperfect being held in the loving arms of a perfect God.
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