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Exchanged Glory III: Wise as Serpents
This is more than the average guy wants to pay for one night with the girl of his dreams!
In their book “Why Wait”, Josh McDowell and Dick Day included a chapter called, “Free Sex.”[58] They pointed out that when sex is widely practiced outside of marriage, it isn’t free – it becomes expensive for everyone. The book is a little old at this point (my copy is from 1987), but its financial figures are still useful. They help us to understand how immorality financially hurts a society.
In 1986, a study estimated that the United States “spent 16.5 billion in welfare costs to support families started by teenage mothers.”[59] By 1991, it was estimated that we would soon be paying a cost of $30 billion per year for sexually transmitted diseases.[60] Adults aren’t the only ones who are being hurt:
“Infants often pay the price for so-called ‘free’ sex. For example, one of the most serious epidemics in American history was the polio epidemic of the 1950s. But in the last twelve months alone, more babies were born with birth defects caused by sexually transmitted disease than the total number of children who suffered from the crippling effects of that post World War II epidemic, which lasted about ten years.”[61]
It is impossible to measure the many other costs of our misled sensuality. When we consider the social difficulties for children growing up in broken homes, the multi-generation poverty that can start with unwed motherhood, and the psychological problems from broken hearts and sexually transmitted diseases, the price tag becomes staggering. We have accepted these losses as a part of life, and the United States has been wealthy enough to absorb some of them, but we need to ask whether it is right that the whole nation should suffer for the sins of some.
Somebody always pays for sex outside of marriage; it’s just a question of who? In the Law, God decided that men should pay.
If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the marriage price and marry her. If her father absolutely refuses to give her away, the man must still pay the marriage price for virgins.
(Exodus 22:16-17, The Message)
The civil punishment for sex with a virgin was that the man should pay a dowry to the girl’s father. If he was lucky, he could marry the girl; if not, he still had to pay.
This law only makes sense if we have a feel for the amount of money in a dowry. We know that Jacob worked seven years for the right to marry his wife Rachel.
So Jacob worked seven years for Rachel. …
(Genesis 29:20, The Message)
This was probably a larger price than most, but it shows that getting married could cost a man several years’ worth of earnings. It is likely the dowry acted as an insurance policy in case the husband died or divorced the wife. Jacob’s wives, Rachel and Leah complained that their father spent their dowry rather than saving it for them.
Then Rachel and Leah answered and said to him, "Is there still any portion or inheritance for us in our father's house? Are we not considered strangers by him? For he has sold us, and also completely consumed our money. For all these riches which God has taken from our father are really ours and our children's; now then, whatever God has said to you, do it."
The fact that Rachel and Leah were upset that their father didn’t invest their dowry for their sakes showed that the dowry was substantial, so we can conclude that the dowry penalty of Exodus 22:16-17 was more than a slap on the wrist.
The Law gives us a numerical figure for the cost of the loss of virginity.
If a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed, and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out, then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife because he has humbled her; he shall not be permitted to divorce her all his days. (emphasis added)
These verses probably refer to rape rather than seduction (although the phrase “they are found out” throws some doubt on that). Either way, the fifty shekels of silver was tied to the loss of virginity, not to rape. The penalty was only prescribed if the girl was a virgin. Rape of a married or engaged girl brought the death penalty (Deuteronomy 22:25). The Bible doesn’t say how a man should be punished if he raped an unmarried woman who wasn’t a virgin, but it is safe to assume that since he had committed a violent crime, he would be punished harshly.
I believe that the fifty shekels of silver charged in this extreme case of violation by rape represents the maximum a father could charge for the dowry penalty. The penalty could go that high but no higher. If his daughter had consented to sex (i.e. no rape) and wanted to marry the man, the father would probably charge less. If the father refused to give his daughter in marriage, he would probably charge as much as he could.
Unfortunately, we aren’t sure exactly what fifty shekels of silver was worth. We can do a simple mathematical calculation based on the current value of sliver, which places the value at somewhere around $500 in today’s dollars. This number doesn’t help much, however, since silver might have been worth far more or far less in the ancient world. (And let’s be honest: if the equivalent of $500 was the penalty in ancient times, it was little more than a slap on the hand – a joke in terms of deterring evil. That seems like far too lenient for rape.)
A shekel was likely worth far more in ancient times than it would be today. We get a feel for this if we compare fifty shekels of silver to other penalties and prices in the law.
If the ox gores a male or female servant, he shall give to their master thirty shekels of silver, and the ox shall be stoned. (emphasis added)
Male indentured servants served for seven years before being freed. Female servants served for life. If a servant was killed, his or her master needed to be compensated for the lost labor. The thirty shekels may not have covered the entire length of servitude, but it had to cover a good portion of that time. So it probably paid for a number of years. It is an indication that a penalty of fifty shekels of silver was a lot of money.
Now the LORD spoke to Moses, saying, "Speak to the children of Israel, and say to them: 'When a man consecrates by a vow certain persons to the LORD, according to your valuation, if your valuation is of a male from twenty years old up to sixty years old, then your valuation shall be fifty shekels of silver, according to the shekel of the sanctuary.’” (emphasis added)
In the above law, where it says that a person is consecrated by a vow, it means that the person was required to serve God in some sort of religious service for a lifetime. He or she had lost the freedom to do anything else. The prophet Samuel is an example of such a person.
Then she (Samuel’s mother) made a vow and said, "O LORD of hosts, if You will indeed look on the affliction of Your maidservant and remember me, …then I will give him to the LORD all the days of his life, … For this child I prayed, …Therefore I also have lent him to the LORD; as long as he lives he shall be lent to the LORD." …
Samuel served God in the sanctuary, as a judge, and as a prophet for his entire life. If someone like Samuel wanted to pursue a different career, he could buy back his freedom for fifty shekels of silver (Leviticus 27:1-3).
Once again we see that this sum covers many years of work. In the case of a twenty-year old man or woman, it was perhaps fifty years’ worth. Based on this, we are once again faced with the fact that if a man had to pay up to fifty shekels of silver as a dowry penalty, he was being severely penalized.
Let me pick a number in dollars to help us relate better. Based on the above comparisons, I will guess that the dowry penalty might equal two years of wages – perhaps $60,000. This is more than the average guy wants to pay for one night with the girl of his dreams!
What would happen if a young man couldn’t pay the penalty? He could be sold into seven years of slavery (as an indentured servant) (Deuteronomy 15:12-14). His lack of self-control would cost him the best years of his life, and he might never recover economically. I believe that Proverbs 5:8-14 gives us a picture of what happened to men who were stung in this way.[62]
Remove your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your honor to others, and your years to the cruel one; lest aliens be filled with your wealth, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner; and you mourn at last, when your flesh and your body are consumed (emphasis added)
The years of servitude and the difficult times that no doubt followed would cause him to mourn as hard work consumed his flesh and body (Proverbs 5:11). He forfeited his years to the cruel one (his slave owner), his labors went to the house of a foreigner (those who benefitted from his work), and his wealth to aliens (the girl’s family). The dowry penalty could have severe consequences that might affect him for a lifetime.
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